If You Have A Secret, People Will

My Job Was Basically To Look At A Good Friend Completely Naked And Rub Lotion On Her Back. I Was Naked Too, But I Got To Put A Towel On Almost Immediately. So I Was Like, "well, This Is Going To Be Embarrassing, But It's Also Going To Be Kinda Awesome."

I Have A Wife And Two Daughters; People Who Depend On Me. Everything Is More Important Than It Was When I Was 20. But Now I'm Like, "eh, I Made It This Far."

If People See Me In Some Sort Of Niche, Then That's Fine. As Long As It's Not "the Naked Guy." I Don't Care.

I Remember Interviewing Someone I Actually Felt Bad For, And Therefore Didn't Want To Take An Ironic Stance Against Him. It Actually Turned Out To Be A Really Funny Piece.

Sometimes We Have To Actually Say, I Think You're Really Funny, But None Of Your Jokes Are Going To Make It On The Air. So Just Answer My Questions. Seriously.