If You Can’t Appreciate What You’ve Got,

The Things Most People Want To Know About Are Usually None Of Their Business.

The Road To Ignorance Is Paved With Good Editions. Only The Illiterate Can Afford To Buy Good Books Now.

Those Who Admire Modern Civilization Usually Identify It With The Steam Engine And The Electric Telegraph.

Newspaper : A Device Unable To Distinguish Between A Bicycle Accident And The Collapse Of Civilisation.

There May Be Some Doubt As To Who Are The Best People To Have Charge Of Children, But There Can Be No Doubt That Parents Are The Worst.