If Anger Were Mileage, I'd Be A

Having A Lean And Hungry Look Was Frowned Upon In My Italian Neighborhood Where A Girl Was Considered Too Skinny If She Could Make Her Knees Touch.

...there Is A Celebrated Aphorism Insisting That The Best Way To Live Is To 'work Like You Don't Need The Money, Dance Like Nobody Is Watching, And Love Like You've Never Been Hurt.'...after Years Of Hearing And Reading These Lines I Have Decided To Tell The Truth: The Original Version Is Wrong. There Is A Grave Error In The Wording Of This Adage. The Correct Version Should Go As Follows: Love Like You Don't Need The Money, Work Like Nobody Is Watching, Dance Like You've Never Been Hurt. See? Doesn't That Make More Sense?

The People I Work With Are Like Family. I Don't Mean This In A Nice Way.

Birthdays Are A Reward For Having Shown Up 365 Days In A Row. It's Like Getting A Badge For Attendance.

I Have An Intimate Relationship With Books. After All, I Take Them With Me Into The Bathtub-not An Invitation I Offer Lightly.