I'd Like To Have Sex With Myself.

No Matter How Much Makeup I Wore, People Just Kept Saying "yes, Sir! Would You Like Tea With That, Sir?" "yes, I Would Like Tea. Why Don't You Put It On My Breasts?" "certainly. Tea For This Man's Breasts! Anything Else, Sir?"

Racist People, Interestingly, Are Never As Polite As Smokers. Have You Noticed That? Smokers Always Go, "do You Mind If I Smoke? Oh, You Do? Okay, I'll Go Outside And Have A Cigarette."

I'm A Dyslexic Person, So I Avoid Books.

I Want To Live Till I Die. No More, No Less.

"i've Done Your Dog. It's Got Nine Eyes Down The Side, I Made His Head All Square, 15 Legs. What Do You Think Of That?" "fido Looks A Bit Weird."