I Was Brought Up A Catholic, For

The Great Thing About Glasgow Is That If There's A Nuclear Attack It'll Look Exactly The Same Afterwards.

When I Read 'be Real, Don't Get Caught Acting,' I Thought, 'how The Hell Do You Do That?'.

Fame Is Being Asked To Sign Your Autograph On The Back Of A Cigarette Packet.

Paddy Was In The Delivery Room When The Midwife Handed Him A Black Baby. "is This Yours?" She Asked "probably" Said Paddy "she Burns Everything Else"

I'm A Citizen Of The World. I Like It That Way. The World's A Wonderful. I Just Think That Some People Are Pretty Badly Represented. But When You Speak To The People Themselves They're Delightful. They All Want So Little.