I Don't Aim To Offend.

Acting Is A Different Discipline. On Stage I'm Free To Say What I Please. But The Change Is Very Good For Ya.

The Great Thing About Glasgow Is That If There's A Nuclear Attack It'll Look Exactly The Same Afterwards.

I Hate All Those Weathermen, Too, Who Tell You That Rain Is Bad Weather. There's No Such Thing As Bad Weather, Just The Wrong Clothing.

I Used To Have Mad Cow's Disease, But I'm Alright Nooooooooow.

,000 People In Hampden Park. Of Course They're All Scottish. Because No One Else Goes There. The English Have An Unwritten Rule: They Only Go To Places They Might Get Back From.