I Play A Musical Instrument A Little,

Television Is A Device That Permits People Who Haven't Anything To Do To Watch People Who Can't Do Anything.

The Average Girl Would Rather Have Beauty Than Brains Because She Knows The Average Man Can See Much Better Than He Can Think- Ladies' Home Journali'd Rather Have Two Girls At Seventeen Than One At Thirty-four

Radio Is A Bag Of Mediocrity Where Little Men With Carbon Minds Wallow In Sluice Of Their Own Making.

Life, In My Estimation, Is A Biological Misadventure That We Terminate On The Shoulders Of Six Strange Men Whose Only Objective Is To Make A Hole In One With You.

Condensed Milk Is Wonderful. I Don't See How They Can Get A Cow To Sit Down On Those Little Cans.