I Once Truly Believed That If I

Years Ago When A Man Began To Notice That If He Stood Up On The Subway He Was Immediately Replaced By Two People, He Figured He Was Getting Too Fat.

If You Have Formed The Habit Of Checking On Every New Diet That Comes Along, You Will Find That, Mercifully, They All Blur Together, Leaving You With Only One Definite Piece Of Information: French-fried Potatoes Are Out.

Children Are Different - Mentally, Physically, Spiritually, Quantitatively, Qualitatively; And Furthermore, They're All A Little Bit Nuts.

Now The Thing About Having A Baby - And I Can't Be The First Person To Have Noticed This - Is That Thereafter You Have It.

The Only Reason That They Say, 'women And Children First' Is To Test The Strength Of The Lifeboats.