I Never Saw Anything Funnier Than Texas

Nothing Like A Few Restful Weeks Contemplating The Decline Of Civilization To Restore The Humors. What I Did On My Summer Vacation Was Listen To A Lot Of People Talk About The Decline Of Practically Everything - You Could Call It The Leisure Of The Theory Class.

Rank Imperialism And Warmongering Are Not American Traditions Or Values. We Do Not Need To Dominate The World.

Texas Liberals Are The Camels Of Good News. We Can Cross Entire Deserts Between Oases.

We Are The People Who Run This Country. We Are The Deciders. And Every Single Day, Every Single One Of Us Needs To Step Outside And Take Some Action To Help Stop This War. Raise Hell. Think Of Something To Make The Ridiculous Look Ridiculous. Make Our Troops Know We're For Them And Trying To Get Them Out Of There. Hit The Streets To Protest Bush's Proposed Surge. If You Can, Go To The Peace March In Washington On Jan. 27. We Need People In The Streets, Banging Pots And Pans And Demanding, 'stop It, Now!'

As They Say Around The Texas Legislature, If You Can't Drink Their Whiskey, Screw Their Women, Take Their Money, And Vote Against 'em Anyway, You Don't Belong In Office.