I’m Never Without A Bandage.

Dogs Are Easier To Love Than People; They're Certainly More Dependable. Once They Love You, That's It. A True Friend In Life Is A Dog.

My Perfect Last Meal Would Be: Shrimp Cocktail, Lasagna, Steak, Creamed Spinach, Salad With Bleu Cheese Dressing, Onion Rings, Garlic Bread, And A Dessert Of Strawberry Shortcake.

Whatever You Do To Recover From A Loss, People Will Be Critical Because They Believe That The Only Way To Recover Is Their Way. And You Will Even Run Into Some People Who Should Be Run Into By Rhinos Because They Actually Don't Want To See You Get Over Your Tragedy At All; Grief Is A Spectator Sport For Them.

My Mother Told Me 'man On Top, Woman Underneath.' For Years My Husband & I Slept In Bunk Beds.

Because I'm The Only Performer Who Comes Out And Says I've Had Plastic Surgery, I've Become The Plastic Surgery Poster Girl, Which Is Hilarious, Because Everybody Has Done It And They All Deny It. They Stand There, Like The Bride Of Frankenstein, They've All Got Stitches, And They All Say, 'i've Done Nothing.' I Talk About It.