I Love To Write Jokes And That's

I Was Going To Have Cosmetic Surgery Until I Noticed That The Doctor's Office Was Full Of Portraits By Picasso.

I Was A Vegetarian Until I Started Leaning Toward The Sunlight.

I Got Kicked Out Of Ballet Class Because I Pulled A Groin Muscle. It Wasn't Mine.

Los Angeles Is A Very Transient Town. It's The Only Place I Know Where You Can Actually Rent A Dog.

Good Weather All The Week, But Come The Weekend The Weather Stinks. When The Weather Is Too Hot They Complain, Too Cold They Complain, And When It's Just Right, They're Watching Tv.