I Look Crazy. I Know I Do.

When You Think About It, Giving Up Your Real Personality Is A Small Price To Pay For The Richness Of Living Happily Ever After With An Actual Man!

These Are Very Confusing Times. For The First Time In History A Woman Is Expected To Combine: Intelligence With A Sharp Hairdo, A Raised Consciousness With High Heels, And An Open, Nonsexist Relationship With A Tan Guy Who Has A Great Bod.

When An Attractive But Aloof ("cool") Man Comes Along, There Are Some Of Us Who Offer To Shine His Shoes With Our Underpants. There Are Thousands Of Scientific Concepts As To Why This Is So, And Yes, Yes, It's Very Sick But None Of This Helps.

You Keep Seeing Your Picture On Posters That You Are Missing But You're Not. That'd Be Weird, Right? Or Say You Look Down At The Sidewalk And Earthworms Are Spelling Your Name. Or You Open A Peanut Bag And The 'hello' Is Written In Your Writing On The Inside Of The Shell. Would That Weird Ya?

Cartoonist Was The Weirdest Name I Finally Let Myself Have. I Would Never Say It. When I Heard It I Silently Thought, What An Awful Word.