I Like Definitive Things.

The Four Levels Of Comedy: Make Your Friends Laugh, Make Strangers Laugh, Get Paid To Make Strangers Laugh, And Make People Talk Like You Because It's So Much Fun.

All I Ever Wanted To Do Is Make People Laugh.

That's The True Spirit Of Christmas; People Being Helped By People Other Than Me.

I Always Did Well On The Essay Questions. Just Put Everything You Know On There, Maybe You'll Hit It.

Being A Good Husband Is Like Being A Good Stand-up Comic - You Need Ten Years Before You Can Even Call Yourself A Beginner.