I Knew I Couldn't Live In America

The Only Thing I Don't Doubt Is My Doubt.

If I Can Make People Laugh It's Like Being A Good Lover.

And Just As I Was Climbing Into That First-class Seat, And Wrapping Myself In A Blanket, Just As I Was Adjusting My Pillow Behind My Head, And Having A Sip Of That Champagne, And Just As I Was Bringing Down And Adjusting My Thai Purple Sleep Mask, I Had An Inkling. I Had A Flash. I Suddenly Thought I Knew What It Was That Had Killed Marilyn Monroe.

When I Was In Therapy About Two Years Ago, One Day I Noticed That I Hadn't Had Any Children. And I Like Children At A Distance. I Wondered If I'd Like Them Up Close. I Wondered Why I Didn't Have Any. I Wondered If It Was A Mistake, Or If I'd Done It On Purpose, Or What. And I Noticed My Therapist Didn't Have Any Children Either. He Had Pictures Of His Cats On The Wall. Framed.

Skiing Is Better Than Sex Actually, Because For Me A Good Round Of Sex Might Be Seven Minutes. Skiing You Can Do For Seven Hours.