I Exist As An Annexe Of The

Now, As A Comic, If You're Vaguely Amusing You Can Go Straight Into Tv, Then You Play The O2 And Then Everyone's Sick Of You.

My Name Is Alexei Yuri Gagarin Siege Of Stalingrad Glorious Five Year Plan Sputnik Tractor Moscow Dynamo Back Four Balowski. Me Dad Was A Bit Of A Communist, Know What I Mean?

I Have A Lot Of Nice Italian Winter Clothes That Make Me Look Like A Sophisticated Lebanese Professor, So My Friend Robert And I Go Around Pretending To Be Experts In Arabic Politics. It Doesn't Work In The Summer Though. I Don't Have The Right Clothes.

I Suppose The Common Idea Of Me Is That I'm Going To Be Someone Who's Hyper And Cracking Jokes All The Time, But People Who Meet Me Are Soon Disabused Of That Notion.

A Lot Of Those Comics Can't Hold Down Relationships And They've Got No Other Life Apart From Performing. They Sleep In Their Jags And A Lot Of Them Can't Even Talk. All They Can Do Is Tell Gags.