I Convinced Him His Luggage Had Gone

We Wondered Why When A Child Laughed, He Belonged To Daddy, And When He Had A Sagging Diaper That Smelled Like A Landfill, 'he Wants His Mother.'

Cleaning The House While The Children Are Home Is Like Shoveling While It's Still Snowing.

Babies On Television Never Spit Up On The Ultrasuede.

My Idea Of Housework Is To Sweep The Room With A Glance.

A Grandparent Will Help You With Your Buttons, Your Zippers, And Your Shoelaces And Not Be In Any Hurry For You To Grow Up.