I Can't Tan Naturally.

I'm A Schizophrenic Mix Of Wannabe Glamourpuss And Absolute Slob, And My Style Is Very Much Magistrate-meets-barmaid.

As A Rule, Wearing A Bigger Pair Of Jeans Looks Better Than Squishing Yourself Into A Pair Of Jeans That Used To Fit Before You Gave Up Smoking.

As A Five-year-old In Berlin In 1965, I Didn't Know That Funny Women Existed. It Wasn't Until I Got Back To England That I Realised Women Could Be Funny.

I Know The New Comedy God Is Surrealism, But It Doesn't Touch My Heart.

I've Got A Hat Face. My Mother Always Said I've Got A Hat Face