I Bought A New Pair Of Pajamas

My Friend Asked Me I Ever Swam With Dolphins. I Was Like, 'yeah, Of Course. What Distance Are We Talking About From The Dolphins? Because The Last Time I Was In The Ocean, I'm Pretty Sure I Swam With Most Of Them.'

I Always Try To Just Be Honest ... As Opposed To Artifice Or Manipulation.

A Pipe Is Greater Than A Bong. Because When You're Smoking A Pipe At Least It Makes You Look Like You're Thinking About Something.

I Was Stuck In Traffic And I Looked In The Mirror And In The Car Behind Me There Was A Couple Having A Horrible Argument And Right Below Their Image It Said "objects In Mirror Are Closer Than They Appear". I Just Thought, Man I Hope So Because She Was Pretty Mad.

The Problem With Most People, Is That They Are Most People.