How To Be A Bouncer: Be An

I Was On The Train The Other Day, And I Heard Somebody Say, I'm Really Good At Checkers. That's The Same Thing As Saying, I'm Not Good At Very Many Things.

I Learned This Summer That Peeing In The Pool And Peeing Into The Pool Are Very Different Things. Location, Location, Location.

I Keep A Lighter In My Back Pocket All The Time. I'm Not A Smoker, I Just Really Like Certain Songs.

'dammit I'm Mad' Is 'dammit I'm Mad' Spelled Backwards.

I Can Tell How Lonely I Am By How Easily I'm Fooled By A Mannequin In A Store.