Hey, Cunningham - Andy Warhol Called. You're

I've Seen Better Coverage At An Alan Keyes Press Conference.

Yeah, This Country's Founding Fathers Are A Bunch Of Dead Rich White Men, But They Did Set Things Up So You Could Come And Sit At The Table, So Don't Piss In The Finger Bowls, All Right? Thank You. In Return For Unfettered Economic Opportunity And No Government Death Squads, Try To Get Along With Your New Stepmotherland, And Don't Be Resentful If There's A Set Of House Rules Already In Place.

Detroit's So Bad This Year They Might Lose Their Bye Week.

It Takes Zero Politically Correct People To Screw In A Lightbulb Because They Are Perpetually In The Dark.

We've Got Nancy Pelosi. She Never Shuts Up. It's Just Occasionally We Have To Hood Her Like A Falcon So We Can Get Some Sleep.