He's Not Fit To Lace My Boots

Me And A Mate Picked Up Two Darling Birds And They Took Us Back To Their Flat. I Went Into The Bedroom With My Bird And She Started Getting Undressed. I Was That Drunk I Was Standing There Wondering How To Get Undressed Without Letting Go Of The Award. I Went To Sit On The Bed, Missed It By Four Feet And Ended Up Lying On The Floor. I Remember The Bird Looking Down At Me, And Saying, ‘some Player Of The Year.’ Then I Fell Asleep. I Woke Up Still Clutching My Award And Staggered Out Of The Flat. I Hadn’t A Bloody Clue Where I Was.

You Can't Trust Very Many People.

He's Not Fit To Lace My Boots As A Player. (on Kevin Keegan)

I'm Ok. Much Better Than On Other Occasions. It's True That I've Made Lots Of Mistakes But I've Never Tried To Bother Anyone. I Want To Stay Alive, Preferably In Peace, Without Seeing Every One Of My Mistakes In The Papers, And On Many Occasions, Even Stories That Are Lies.

Robert Redford Used To Be Such A Handsome Man And Now Look At Him: Everything Has Dropped, Expanded And Turned A Funny Color.