Happy White Peoples Independence Day The Slaves

You Know The World Is Messed Up When The Tallest Man In The Nba Is Chinese, The Best Golfer Is Black, And The Best Rapper Is White.

I'll Probably Pay More Attention To The Musicians In The Pit Than The Stars Because They're The Closest You're Going To Get To Normal People In The Audience.

I Like Talking About Subjects That Aren't Funny In The First Place And Making Them Funny. So Anything Down And Depressing Is Something I'll Talk About.

Funny Is Only Something That Others Know About You - You Can't Be Funny By Yourself.

If You're The President You Only Have Two Jobs: Peace And Money.