God! I Loove This City!

You Cover Q-tips With Sandpaper And Ram Them Up Your Nostrils As Far As They Will Go. Then You Sniff Talcum Powder While Shredding Hundred Dollar Bills.

Baffling Late-life Discovery: Golfers Wear Those Awful Clothes On Purpose.

San Francisco Isn't What It Used To Be, And It Never Was.

New Yorkers Are Stuck In A Gloomy Mucilage Of Mutual Commiseration.

Martinis Are Like Breasts, One Isn't Enough, And Three Is Too Many.