Glitter Is The Herpes Of Craft Supplies.

When I First Heard The Term 'training Bra,' I Was Freaked Out. I Was Pretty Young And I Said, 'did You Just Say Training Bra? They're Training Their Chests? I Had No Idea.' See Some Lady, Her Boobs Are Everywhere. 'what's Her Deal?' Those Are Untrained Titties.

You Need An Audience To Help You Figure Out What's Working And What's Worth Putting On Your Album Or Your Special - Or Even Just What's Worth Touring With.

The Shortest Distance Between Two Idiots Is A Conga Line.

Wind Chimes Are Also Earthquake Chimes.

I Just Started Doing This One-man Show, And I Wanted To Be Able To Score It, So I Bought A Guitar, And Got A Keyboard And Got A Harmonica. I Remember When I Started That I Didn't Understand Why A Harmonica Had Different Letters On Them.