Gay People Don’t Actually Try To Convert

I’ve Always Been Able To Tell A Lot About People By Whether They Ask Me About My Scar. Most People Never Ask, But If It Comes Up Naturally Somehow And I Offer Up The Story, They Are Quite Interested. Some People Are Just Dumb: 'did A Cat Scratch You?' God Bless. Those Sweet Dumdums I Never Mind. Sometimes It Is A Fun Sociology Litmus Test, Like When My Friend Ricky Asked Me, 'did They Ever Catch The Black Guy That Did That To You?' Hmmm. It Was Not A Black Guy, Ricky, And I Never Said It Was.

Photoshop Is Just Like Makeup. When It’s Done Well It Looks Great, And When It’s Overdone You Look Like A Crazy Asshole.

If You Are Capable People Are Happy To Play With You.

A New Poll Showed That 66% Of Americans Think President Bush Is Doing A Poor Job Handling The War In Iraq And The Remaining 34% Think That Adam And Eve Rode Dinosaurs To Church.

You Know Who Does Have A Funny Bone In Her Body? Your Mom Every Night For A Dollar.