Fear," She Says, "is More Powerful Than

What?" I Ask. "i'm Developing A Theory." "and It Is?" She Picks Up Her Hamburger, Grins, And Says, "that You Have A Death Wish.

I Open The Door To The Fear Landscape Room And Flip Open The Small Black Box That Was In My Back Pocket To See The Syringes Inside. This Is The Box I Have Always Used, Padded Around The Needles; It Is A Sign Of Something Sick Inside Me, Or Something Brave.

But Christina And I Are Not People Who Cry Together; We're People Who Fight Together. So I Hold My Tears In.

I Keep Finding Myself Stifled By The Company Of Others And Then Crippled By Loneliness When I Leave Them. I Am Terrified And I Don't Even Know Of What, Because I Have Lost Everything Already.

She Tries To Turn Too Soon, And The Ladder Smacks Into Fernando's Shoulder. "oh! Sorry, Nando." The Jolt Knocks His Glasses Askew. He Smiles At Christina And Takes The Glasses Off, Shoving Them Into His Pocket. "nando?" I Say To Him. "i Thought The Erudite Didn't Like Nicknames?" "when A Pretty Girl Calls You By A Nickname," He Says, "it Is Only Logical To Respond To It.