Drink Never Made A Man Better, But

A Rayformer Thinks He Was Ilicted Because He Was A Rayformer, Whin Th Thruth Iv Th Matther Is He Was Ilicted Because No Wan Knew Him.

Swearing Was Invented As A Compromise Between Running Away And Fighting.

A Man That'd Expict To Thrain Lobsters To Fly In A Year Is Called A Loonytic; But A Man That Thinks Men Can Be Tur-rned Into Angels By An Iliction Is Called A Rayformer An' Remains At Large.

The Past Always Looks Better Than It Was; It's Only Pleasant Because It Isn't Here.

Th' Newspaper Does Ivrything F'r Us. It Runs Th' Polis Foorce An' Th' Banks, Commands Th' Milishy, Controls Th' Ligislachure, Baptizes Th' Young, Marries Th' Foolish, Comforts Th' Afflicted, Afflicts Th' Comfortable, Buries Th' Dead An' Roasts Thim Aftherward.