Do You Know Who Will Be In

Well, There's A Bright Side To This For Ken Lay. You Know, Throughout The Years Ken Lay Has Been A Big Campaign Contributor To The Republican Party. So Now, He'll Be Able To Meet With Those Same People When He Goes To Prison.

When We Finally Have This Recall Election In October, There Could Be As Many As 200 People On The Ballot. And You Know What's Really Scary? Most Of Them Don't Know The First Thing About Driving A State Into Bankruptcy. They're Not Experts Like Governor Gray Davis.

Scientists Believe That Monkeys Can Be Taught To Think, Lie And Even Play Politics Within Their Community. If We Can Just Teach Them To Cheat On Their Wives We Can Save Millions On Congressional Salaries.

According To The L.a. Times, Attorney General John Ashcroft Wants To Take "a Harder Stance" On The Death Penalty. What's A Harder Stance On The Death Penalty? We're Already Killing The Guy? How Do You Take A Harder Stance On The Death Penalty? What, Are You Going To Tickle Him First? Give Him Itching Powder? Put A Thumbtack On The Electric Chair?

Some Democrats Say The Estimated $60 Billion Dollar Cost Of A War With Iraq Could Be Better Spent At Home. When He Heard That, President Bush Agreed And Announced Plans To Bomb Ohio.