Did You Ever Feel Like The Whole

People Love Gossip. It's The Biggest Thing That Keeps The Entertainment Industry Going.

I Appreciate Your Giving My Book -- And In No Small Way, Me -- A Chance. To Thank You, I Really Wanted To Acknowledge All Of You In The Book. Unfortunately, I Didn't Have Enough Room For Each Name. So I've Put In A Code Name That Stands For All Of You Reading This Book. The Name Is 'mom.' It Will Be Our Little Secret. So When You See 'mom' In The Acknowledgments, You'll Know I'm Really Talking About You. And Don't Let My Mother Try To Tell You Otherwise.

I Learned Compassion From Being Discriminated Against. Everything Bad That's Ever Happened To Me Has Taught Me Compassion.

I Still Have The Shirt I Wore My First Time On Johnny Carson's Show. Only Now I Use It As A Tablecloth At Dinner Parties. It Was Very Blousy.

The Reason I Do What I Do Is Because I Was Influenced By Steve Martin, By Woody Allen, By Bob Newhart, By Carol Burnett, By Lucille Ball.