Children Make Your Life Important.

Before You Try To Keep Up With The Joneses, Be Sure They're Not Trying To Keep Up With You.

I Have A Hat. It Is Graceful And Feminine And Give Me A Certain Dignity, As If I Were Attending A State Funeral Or Something. Someday I May Get Up Enough Courage To Wear It, Instead Of Carrying It.

Dreams Have Only One Owner At A Time. That's Why Dreamers Are Lonely.

In Two Decades I've Lost A Total Of 789 Pounds. I Should Be Hanging From A Charm Bracelet.

Someone Once Threw Me A Small, Brown, Hairy Kiwi Fruit, And I Threw A Wastebasket Over It Until It Was Dead.