By The Age Of Six Or Seven,

I Think The Warning Labels On Alcoholic Beverages Are Too Bland. They Should Be More Vivid. Here Is One I Would Suggest: "alcohol Will Turn You Into The Same Asshole Your Father Was.

I Don't Have A Fear Of Heights. I Do, However, Have A Fear Of Falling From Heights.

If The Cincinnati Reds Were Really The First Major League Baseball Team, Who Did They Play?

The Effect Of The Coke On Our Relationship [with My Wife Brenda] Was Very Sick. Now That It's Over, Those Were Actually Funny Times. Looking For Each Other's Coke, Hiding It, Finding It, Doing Some, Not Telling The Other. Then Fighting Over It.

There Are Actually People Who Go Out And Re-fight These Battles. You Know What I Say? Use Real Ammunition! You Just Might Raise The Intelligence Level Of The American Gene Pool!