Being A Working Mother Means That You

Being A Working Mother Means That You Are Always Disappointing Somebody.

All This Nothing Has Meant More To Me Than So Many Somethings

Maybe That Whole Love Thing Is Just A Grown-up Version Of Santa Claus; Just A Myth We've Been Fed Since Childhood. So, We Keep Buying Magazines, Joining Clubs, And Doing Therapy And Watching Movies With Hit Pop Songs Played Over Love Montages All In A Pathetic Attempt To Explain Why Our Love Santa Keeps Getting Caught In The Chimney.

I Heard That Chivalry Was Dead, But I Think It's Just Got A Bad Flue.

Through Clinton And Monica, Clinton And Hillary, The Scandal, The Impeachment, Iraq, Bruce And Demi, Ellen And Anne, I Have Remained Consistently And Nauseatingly Adorable. I Have, In Fact, Been Known To Cause Diabetes.