Because Nobody Goes Through Life Without A

People Invite Me To Dinner Not Because I Can Cook, But Because I Like To Clean Up. I Get Immediate Gratification From Windex. Yes, I Do Windows.

I Had A Good Loud Voice And I Wasn't Afraid To Be Goofy Or Zany.

If You Want To Know The Feeling [of Labor Pain], Just Take Your Bottom Lip And Pull It Over Your Head.

Before You Go To Bed, Write Down Three 'gratefuls' For The Day And Three 'did Wells' (they Can Even Include Something As Simple As Doing The Laundry)-the Results Can Be Amazing!

Comedy Is Tragedy Plus Time.