Because I'm Not, In Fact, Depressed, Prozac

In That Six Months, So Much Happened That Death Seemed, Primarily, Inconvenient. The Trial Period Was Extended. I Seem To Keep Extending It. There Are Many Things To Do. There Are Books To Write And Naps To Take. There Are Movies To See And Scrambled Eggs To Eat. Life Is Essentially Trivial. You Either Decide You Will Take The Trite Business Of Life And Give Yourself The Option Of Doing Something Really Cool, Or You Decide You Will Opt For The Grand Epic Of Eating Disorders And Dedicate Your Life To Being Seriously Trivial.

I Do Have Faith. I Don't Have Faith That A God Exists, Nor Do I Have Faith That One Does Not; I Have Absolute Faith That I Do Not Know, Cannot Know, Am Only Human, Am An Infinitesimal Creature Packed Onto A Cramped Planet Crowded With Seven Billion Bodies, And As Many Yearning Hearts, And As Many Questioning Minds.

You Never Come Back, Not All The Way. Always There Is An Odd Distance Between You And The People You Love And The People You Meet, A Barrier Thin As The Glass Of A Mirror, You Never Come All The Way Out Of The Mirror; You Stand, For The Rest Of Your Life, With One Foot In This World And No One In Another, Where Everything Is Upside Down And Backward And Sad.

There Is, In Fact, An Incredible Freedom In Having Nothing Left To Lose.

My Relationships With Both My Mother And Father Are Good. We Spent Several Difficult Years Hashing Over The Problems And The Past, And Worked Out A Fairly Solid Middle Ground. I Wouldn't Say My Relationship With Either Of Them - They're No Longer Together - Is Exactly Typical, But That Would Be Difficult After All We Went Through.