Anyone Who Has Dead Straight Hair Wants

I Have A Fear Of Poverty In Old Age. I Have This Vision Of Myself Living In A Skip And Eating Cat Food. It's Because I'm Freelance, And I've Never Had A Proper Job. I Don't Have A Pension, And My Savings Are Dwindling. I Always Thought Someone Would Just Come Along And Look After Me.

After Graduating From Flares And Platforms In The Early 1970s, I Started Drama School Wearing A Pair Of Khaki Dungarees With One Of My Dad's Army Shirts, Accessorised By A Cat's Basket Doubling As A Handbag. Very Lady Gaga.

I've Never Been Prudish.

I Am Best Viewed From A Distance.

People Often Ask Why Comedy Is Harder For Women, And The Reason Is Because A Tampon Will Sometimes Fall Out When You're On Stage. Blokes Don't Have That Worry.