Am I Not Turtley Enough For The

I Really Enjoy Being A Dad, And Maybe I Took It Too Seriously, But I Love Being Around My Kids.

Am I Not Turtley Enough For The Turtle Club? Turtle! Turtle!

While Many Comics Have A Secret Persona, I Fundamentally Want To Be Myself.

A Mom And Dad Found An S&m Magazine Under Their 10-year-old Son's Bed, And The Dad Said, 'well, We Sure Can't Spank Him.'

My Obama Is Getting Pretty Good ... I Think I'll Vote For Whoever Makes My Portrayal Easier. It Takes Time To Put Together A Comic Impression. It Takes Time To Recognize The Tics. Right Now, For Instance, I Could Do A Dead- On Paul Ryan And People Wouldn't Recognize It. Personalities Take A While To Sin.