All They Teach You In Drama School

Valentine's Day Is Celebrated A Little Differently Here In L.a. Nobody Eats Chocolate Because Of The Calories, So People Give Each Other Tofu-shaped Boxes Filled With Bean Curd. Then They Fantasize About What Their Pilates Instructor Would Be Like If He Was Straight.

We Do Have A Big Kind Of History In Literate Tradition Of Vikings And We Have A Lot Of Viking Blood In Scotland, I Mean Especially Up North Wherever You Go You See A Plastic Viking Sitting Outside A Shop And Viking Calendars And - Because They - You Know They Came Down And Stole All Our Chicks And Then Some Of Them Didn't Quite Get Back And Ended Up Settling Down Here. So There's A Lot Of Viking Blood In Scotland.

Why Don't They Allow Professional Wrestling At The Olympics? They Allow Pro Basketball Players And Hockey Players. Olympic Pro Wrestling Would Be Awesome. The Team From Mexico Could Wear Those Mr. X Masks. The French Wrestler Could Hit His Opponent With A Baguette. Or Perhaps Just Surrender.

Fraser's Mother, Janice, Was Actually Quite A Happy Soul But She Had To Hide It Because, Like All Pseudo Intellectuals, She Thought Being Cheery Made Her Look Stupid, Which Of Course She Was For Believing That Rubbish In The First Place. She Like To Talk About Sartre Sometimes, Just As Insurance.

I Think I'm Just Someone That Just Tries To Get By. I'm Kind Of - If It Was During The Second World War, I'd Be A Black Marketeer, I Think.