Alcoholism Is A Disease, But It's The

I Got An Ant Farm. Them Fellas Didn't Grow Anything. Hey, How About Some Celery? Plus, If I Tore Your Legs Off, You Would Look Like Snowmen.

Every Mcdonald's Commercial Ends The Same Way: Prices And Participation May Vary. I Wanna Open A Mcdonald's And Not Participate In Anything. I Wanna Be A Stubborn Mcdonald's Owner. "cheeseburgers?" "nope! We Got Spaghetti, And Blankets."

I Got In An Argument With A Girlfriend Inside Of A Tent. That's A Bad Place For An Argument, Because I Tried To Walk Out, And Had To Slam The Flap.

I Have An Idea For Sweatshops: Air Conditioning! That's Simple. 14 Year Old Boys Working Twelve Hour Days? "yeah, But They're Comfortable!"

It's Weird... People Say They're Not Like Apes. Now How Do You Explain Football Then?