After His Death The Gardener Does Not

Among Human Beings, A Cat Is Merely A Cat; Among Cats, A Cat Is A Prowling Shadow In A Jungle.

Only Years Of Practice Will Teach You The Mysteries And Bold Certainty Of A Real Gardener, Who Treads At Random, Yet Tramples On Nothing.

A Guy Wanted The Vet To Cut His Dog's Tail Off. The Vet Asked Why. Well, My Mother In Law Is Visiting Next Month And I Want To Eliminate Any Possible Indication That She Is Welcome.

Robots Of The World, You Are Ordered To Exterminate The Human Race. Do Not Spare The Men. Do Not Spare The Women. Preserve Only The Factories, Railroads, Machines, Mines, And Raw Materials. Destroy Everything Else. Then Return To Work. Work Must Not Cease.

The Sole Perfection Which Modern Civilization Attains Is A Mechanical One; Machines Are Splendid And Flawless, But The Life Which Serves Them Or Is Served By Them, Is Neither Superb Nor Brilliant, Nor More Perfect Nor More Graceful; Nor Is The Work Of The Machines Perfect; Only They, The Machines, Are Like Gods.