A Pear Is A Failed Apple.

I Also Survived Circumcision, A Barbaric Practice Designed To Remind You As Early As Possible That Your Genitals Are Not Your Own.

Now, Some People Do This For Shock Value. Shock Is Just Another Uptown Word For Surprise. Granted It Has A Different Quality To It, But A Joke Is About Surprising Someone. I'm A Great Believer In Context. You Can Joke About Anything. I Do Like Finding Out Where The Line Is Drawn, Deliberately Crossing It And Bringing Some Of Them With Me Across The Line, And Having Them Be Happy That I Did.

In Football The Object Is To March Into Enemy Territory And Cross His Goal. In Baseball The Object Is To Go Home.

Everybody In America Is A Part Of This Big Herd Of Cattle Being Led To The Marketplace, Not To Be Sold, Which Is Usual With Cattle, But To Do The Buying. And Everyone Is Branded. You See The Brands - Nike, Puma, Coke - All Over Their Bodies. Pretty Soon You'll Go To A Family And Say, "$100,000 If We Can Tattoo Pepsi On Your Child's Forehead, And We'll Have It Removed When He's Twenty-one. A Hundred Grand."

Granola Didn't Sell Very Well When It Was Good For You. Now It Has Caramel, Chocolate, Marshmallow, Saturated Fat And Sweeteners With A Small Amount Of Oats And Grains. Sales Picked Up.