A Lot Of You Cared, Just Not

Because No, I Didn’t Push Her Away. I Didn’t Add To Her Pain Or Do Anything To Hurt Her. Instead, I Left Her Alone In That Room. The Only Person Who Might’ve Been Able To Reach Out And Save Her From Herself. To Pull Her Back From Wherever She Was Heading. I Did What She Asked And I Left. When I Should Have Stayed.

I Didn't Feel Physically Sick. But Mentally. My Mind Was Twisting In So Many Ways. (...) We Once Saw A Documentary On Migraines. One Of The Men Interviewed Used To Fall On His Knees And Bang His Head Against The Floor, Over And Over During Attacks. This Diverted The Pain From Deep Inside His Brain, Where He Couldn't Reach It, To A Pain Outside That He Had Control Over.

A Lot Of You Cared, Just Not Enough.

His Door Is Closed Behind Me. It's Staying Closed. He's Letting Me Go. I Think I've Made Myself Very Clear, But No Ones Stepping Forward To Stop Me. A Lot Of You Cared, Just Not Enough. And That...that Is What I Needed To Find Out. And I Did Find Out. And I'm Sorry.

And It Feels Strange, Almost Sad, To Walk Through Ther Empty Halls. Each Step I Take Sounds So Lonely.