A Lot Of People Have Asked Me

My Marriage License Reads, 'to Whom It May Concern,'

I've Been Coming Back Like A Rubber Ball For Years.

John Frances, Entertainment Chair, Of The Friars Club: Of All The Roasts That I Have Produced For The Friars Club, This Is The One That I Am Most Excited About. Mickey Is One Of The Club's Dearest Friends, And We Wanted To Honor Him In The Way We Know Best.

Someone Once Asked Me What I Want On My Epitaph When I Pass Away. Just The Words 'i Tried.' That's What This Game Of Life Is All About. Trying. There's The Tryers, The Criers, And The Liars.

When I Open A Refrigerator Door And The Light Goes On, I Want To Perform.