You Might Be A Redneck If You

If You Have A Complete Set Of Salad Bowls And They All Say Kool Whip On The Side, You Might Be A Redneck.

I Talked To Larry The Cable Guy The Other Day. Larry's Made More Money Than 10 People Should Ever Make In A Lifetime. He Was Excited Because He'd Gone Over To The Livestock Auction And Bought 20 New Feeder Pigs.

For The First Time Ever I Was Taking The Family On The Road. We Stayed With My In-laws, Which On Life's List Of Experiences Ranks Right Below Sitting In A Tub Full Of Scissors.

You Might Be A Redneck If... Your High School Basketball Game Got Rained Out.

[about Sex And Being Married] It's Like Being The National Guard, We May Not Be Seeing As Much Action As The Front Line, But We Are Living To Fight Another Day.