You Have Kim Jong Il, And You

Did You Hear About This Genius That Got On A Plane And Set Fire To His Feet? Turns Out He Had Bombs In His Shoes And The Problem All Started When The Flight Attendants Asked Him Nicely To Extinguish His Feet. He Was Wearing Exploding Sneakers. The New Nike Air-jihads!

I Vote Democrat Because I Love The Fact That I Can Now Marry Whatever I Want. I've Decided To Marry My German Shepherd.

The Best Part About Holiday Parties Is The Alcohol. You Have A Couple Of Drinks And You Tell Your Coworkers And Your Superiors What You Really Think About Them. And Then The Fun Begins.

There Is So Much Oil Now In The Gulf Of Mexico, And You Can Thank The Folks Of British Petroleum For This, So Much Oil In The Gulf, You Can Now Park On It.

In Pop Culture News, Lady Gaga Got Married. And Yes, She Was Wearing White Meat.