You Can't Stay Mad At Somebody Who

Apparently 26 Years Ago, Arnold Gave An Interview To Oui Magazine About His Sex Life. The Good News Is That Arnold Is Married To Maria Shriver And Now That He's Had A Sex Scandal, The Kennedy Family Has Finally Accepted Him.

I Tell You, The Economy Is In Bad Shape. In Fact, The Economy Is So Bad, President Barack Obama's New Slogan Is 'spare Change You Can Believe In.'

The Big Question Now Is Who Will Take Power In Afghanistan Once The Taliban Is Defeated. I Was Thinking, How About Al Gore? He's Not Doing Anything, He Needs A Job, And He's Already Got The Beard.

The Senate Is Now Considering Increasing Government Subsidies For Corn Growers To Produce More Ethanol. If We Produce Enough Ethanol We Can Postpone Our Next Invasion Of A Middle Eastern Country For Two To Three Years.

Bush Reiterated His Stand To Conservatives Opposing His Decision On Stem Cell Research. He Said Today He Believes Life Begins At Conception And Ends At Execution.