Wine, Madam, Is God's Next Best Gift

Deliberation, N.: The Act Of Examining One's Bread To Determine Which Side It Is Buttered On.

Physician, N. One Upon Whom We Set Our Hopes When Ill And Our Dogs When Well.

Present, N. That Part Of Eternity Dividing The Domain Of Disappointment From The Realm Of Hope.

As A Means Of Dispensing Formulated Ignorance Our Boasted Public School System Is Not Without Merit; It Spreads Out Education Sufficiently Thin To Give Everyone Enough To Make Him A More Competent Fool Than He Would Have Been Without It.

Antipathy, N. The Sentiment Inspired By One's Friend's Friend.