Why Don't You Get Out Of That

A Man Of Forty Today Has Nothing To Worry Him But Falling Hair, Inability To Button The Top Button, Failing Vision, Shortness Of Breath, A Tendency Of The Collar To Shut Off All Breathing, Trembling Of The Kidneys To Whatever Tune The Orchestra Is Playing, And A General Sense Of Giddiness When The Matter Of Rent Is Brought Up. Forty Is Life's Golden Age.

I Have Been Told By Hospital Authorities That More Copies Of My Works Are Left Behind By Departing Patients Than Those Of Any Other Author.

There Is A Note In The Front Of The Volume Saying That No Public Reading May Be Given Without First Getting The Author's Permission. It Ought To Be Made Much More Difficult To Do Than That.

I Can't Bring Myself To Say, 'well, I Guess I'll Be Toddling Along.' It Isn't That I Can't Toddle. It's Just That I Can't Guess I'll Toddle.

The Biggest Obstacle To Professional Writing Is The Necessity For Changing A Typewriter Ribbon.