Whoa. If High School Was Suppose To

You Know," I Said, Holding My Ground. "i Gotta Tell You. The Goatee Thing? Yeah, Way Over. And You Know A Little Jewelry Really Does Go A Long Way. Just Something You Might Want To Consider. I'm Actually Glad You Stopped By, Because I Have A Couple Things I've Been Meaning To Say To You. Number One, About Your Wife? Yeah, She's A Skank. And Number Two, You Know That Whole Thing Where You Killed Jesse And Then Buried His Remains Out Back There? Yeah, Way Un-cool.

And I Like A Good Horror Story As Much As The Next Person So Long As They Kill Off Some Men Too And Not Just Girls. But The Voices Joan Heard Were Real. There’s Clear And Substantiated Proof They Were Real.

I Might Look Like A Honey-eyed Schoolgirl On The Outside, In My Skirt With Its Regulation Four-inches-above-the-knee Hem. But I'll Rip Those Tassels Off Your Shoes, Old Man. Just Try Googling Me.

Of Course. I Was On The Run From Evil Spirits That Wanted To Kill Me And Now, According To The Local Paper, The Law. Yet Richard Smith, Cemetery Sexton And Death Deity Scholar, Had A Book For Me To Read In All My Copious Spare Time.

So Take My Advice: Whatever You Do? Don’t Blink