Who The Heck Is Don Quick-oats?

Gonzo Narrows His Eyes. 'how Often Do You Clean That Thing?' 'every Night,' The Waitress Answers. Her Smile Is Strained. 'that's It? Do You Know How Long It Takes For Listeria To Grow Under Those Hot Lamps, Even With Ice?' Here We Go. 'it Can Happen In Just Five Hours. Five Hours And You've Got The Salad Bar Of Death!' The Waitress Looks Confused. 'from Listerine?

Dude, This Is A Stoner Conversation And We're Not Even High

Look, I Know This Seems A Little Half-assed...' 'no, Dude. I'd Be Thrilled If This Plan Were Half-assed. This Is, Like, No-assed.' 'you're Right. It's The Most No-assed Thing I've Ever Done In My Life.

Scoring Well On Tests Is The Sort Of Happy Thing That Gets The School District The Greenbacks They Crave. Understanding And Appreciating The Material Are Secondary.

What Do You Feel? I’ve Never Been Asked This Question Once. None Of Us Has. We Aren’t Supposed To Feel. We’re British.