When I Was Six Years Old I

I'm Done With Men. I Have A Hamster. That's All I Need.

Aren't You Something," Grandma Said. "i Never Saw A Midget Up Close." "little Person," Briggs Said. "and I Never Saw Anyone As Old As You Up Close, Either.

I Met A Real Looker. He Picked Me Up At The Two Dollar Slot Machines, So You Know He's No Cheapskate." Grandma Mazur

When I Was Six Years Old I Sprinkled Sugar On My Head, Convinced Myself It Was Pixie Dust, Wished Myself Invisible, And Walked Into The Boys' Bathroom At School.

I Checked My Phone Messages. Three In All. The First Was From Joe. “hey, Cupcake.” That Was It. That Was The Whole Message. The Second Was From Ranger. “yo.” Ranger Made Joe Look Like A Chatterbox.